Ahhhh. GoodNight.

(01:50:42) Alex Jung: lets talk here
(01:50:45) Andrew: okay.
(01:50:49) Andrew: i’d rather do so anyway.
(01:50:53) Andrew: cause i can save.
(01:50:59) Andrew: and upload it to my page
(01:51:02) Andrew: should i desire to
(01:51:10) Andrew: its not something i have to do.
(01:51:12) Andrew: anyway
(01:51:13) Andrew: your turn to say
(01:51:25) Alex Jung: so the question was do you think you are a know it all
(01:51:30) Andrew: ya
(01:51:45) Alex Jung: not really since no one can know everything
(01:51:50) Andrew: well
(01:51:52) Andrew: the reason i ask
(01:51:57) Andrew: is cause my aunt jenny said i was.
(01:51:58) Andrew: but
(01:51:59) Andrew: honestly
(01:52:09) Andrew: i think it’s not so much as me Knowing it all and acting that way.
(01:52:17) Andrew: but her not knowing enough, and acting stupidlay.
(01:52:58) Andrew: i mean, do i come off as someone who seems like I am always right?
(01:53:08) Andrew: or maybe i come off that way, because i’m right so often.
(01:53:21) Andrew: objectively i’d have to consider that possibility.
(01:53:30) Andrew: but the reason i’m right is because i leave room for being wrong.
(01:53:37) Alex Jung: lol
(01:54:00) Alex Jung: hmmm well everyone has their own views on other people
(01:54:45) Andrew: which is fine, except my aunt’s view is warped to make herself seem better than others.
(01:54:56) Andrew: and she invents problems for her to solve to make herself out to be better than she is.
(01:55:08) Andrew: and she finds small things to inadvertently insult people.
(01:55:18) Alex Jung: ah icic
(01:55:20) Alex Jung: well thats just her
(01:55:25) Alex Jung: there are people like that in the world
(01:55:28) Andrew: and as she is not aware of it herself, she is truly stupid.
(01:55:35) Andrew: =) so is it up to me to fix her?
(01:55:38) Andrew: can she be fixed?
(01:55:50) Andrew: obviously, it’s not my problem.
(01:56:26) Andrew: but the guilt that insues from not deciding to take action to alleviate her idiocy annoys me.
(01:56:40) Andrew: i mean, she’s like this with everyone, not just my mother and me.
(01:56:47) Andrew: also her sister, and sylvia and the baby.
(01:57:04) Andrew: how many terrible relationships does she have to go through before she starts realizing that perhaps She’s the problem?
(01:57:54) Andrew: Also, i ran into Aly today, outside sushi.
(01:58:02) Alex Jung: hmmmm ya your aunt has a problem
(01:58:05) Alex Jung: o
(01:58:06) Alex Jung: thats good
(01:58:07) Andrew: or rather, she ran into me.
(01:58:10) Alex Jung: what did you guys do
(01:58:10) Alex Jung: ?
(01:58:14) Andrew: she noticed and said hi to me.
(01:58:14) Andrew: uhh
(01:58:34) Andrew: we walked to Cinnaholic and got a CookieDough Strawberry peach CinnamonBun.
(01:58:43) Andrew: Vegan too.
(01:59:08) Andrew: and then we sat near a tree
(01:59:09) Alex Jung: yum
(01:59:11) Andrew: and talked for an hour
(01:59:17) Alex Jung: that sounds yummy
(01:59:18) Alex Jung: o
(01:59:19) Alex Jung: kk
(01:59:22) Alex Jung: what did you guys talk about?
(01:59:24) Andrew: uhh
(01:59:25) Andrew: random stuff
(01:59:27) Alex Jung: hahaha
(01:59:28) Alex Jung: icic
(01:59:30) Andrew: i dont quite remember
(01:59:31) Andrew: food?
(01:59:35) Alex Jung: lol
(01:59:35) Andrew: best food places..
(01:59:37) Alex Jung: ah
(01:59:37) Andrew: gifts for guys..
(01:59:40) Alex Jung: lol
(01:59:43) Alex Jung: why tak that
(01:59:44) Alex Jung: talk
(01:59:46) Andrew: and how there isn’t really a standard of guy gift giving.
(01:59:54) Andrew: cause girls have makeups..
(01:59:56) Andrew: bags..
(01:59:58) Alex Jung: hahaha
(02:00:04) Alex Jung: why did you guys talk about these things?
(02:00:07) Andrew: no idea.
(02:00:11) Andrew: honestly, it’s a blur to me.
(02:00:18) Andrew: i just remember her smiling, and me laughing.
(02:00:44) Andrew: it’s just so weird..
(02:00:48) Andrew: i mean, think about it
(02:00:50) Andrew: i run into her..
(02:00:59) Andrew: on a busy street
(02:01:08) Andrew: at this exact time.
(02:01:16) Andrew: if I’d not stopped to talk to my friend by the atm.
(02:01:23) Andrew: if I’d stayed at BT for a few minutes longer.
(02:01:46) Andrew: if I’d not gotten a ride into berkeley early.
(02:01:59) Andrew: if I’d not gotten dropped off.
(02:02:06) Andrew: things woulda been so different..
(02:02:08) Andrew: but just..
(02:02:10) Andrew: BY cHANCE?
(02:02:14) Alex Jung: ya
(02:02:17) Alex Jung: that would be a thing
(02:02:18) Alex Jung: cahnce
(02:02:26) Alex Jung: i would say that would be the case
(02:02:28) Alex Jung: hey
(02:02:34) Alex Jung: you did sya you would see her on thrus
(02:02:37) Andrew: it’s so serendipitious, it’s almost akin to divine if it’s true.
(02:02:37) Alex Jung: when you last spoke to me
(02:02:38) Alex Jung: lol
(02:02:39) Andrew: LOL
(02:02:45) Andrew: well i was thinking IN CLASS.
(02:02:48) Andrew: not randomly on the street.
(02:02:51) Andrew: and SHE ran into ME.
(02:02:54) Andrew: i didn’t even see her.
(02:03:18) Andrew: i told you, didn’t I.
(02:03:18) Andrew: ?
(02:03:21) Andrew: about CreatedFate.
(02:03:26) Andrew: and LOA.
(02:03:32) Andrew: aand.. the power of Intentions?
(02:03:50) Andrew: and The Seven ?
(02:03:55) Alex Jung: no you didn’t
(02:03:58) Andrew: NOOo?
(02:03:59) Andrew: wow.
(02:04:00) Andrew: well
(02:04:03) Andrew: it’s in the blog Somewhere..
(02:04:06) Andrew: but lemme be brief.
(02:04:08) Alex Jung: maybe the seven
(02:04:13) Andrew: basically, it means that Thoughts become Things.
(02:04:26) Andrew: the problem most people have, is their thoughts are never clear.
(02:04:39) Andrew: and people have subconcious thoughts based upon previous events.
(02:04:44) Andrew: so when you get clear.
(02:04:50) Andrew: when you know exactly what you want
(02:04:53) Andrew: you can get it, with ease.
(02:05:06) Andrew: My seven things I want, are simple, and clear.
(02:05:15) Andrew: A mind open with wonder, and not closed by belief.
(02:05:21) Andrew: A body that speaks louder than words ever could
(02:05:25) Andrew: A place to someday call home.
(02:05:39) Andrew: A companion to share the world with, to see life through a dog’s eyes.
(02:05:47) Andrew: Someone to love who loves me just the same.
(02:05:54) Andrew: A job too fun to be called work.
(02:05:59) Andrew: A constant Connection with the future.
(02:06:09) Alex Jung: is this all in order?
(02:06:14) Andrew: These are my intentions, and my world conciously brings these 7 things into existence.
(02:06:22) Andrew: uhh, no particular order, but i remember it this way.
(02:06:38) Andrew: i suppose they Are sorta in order.
(02:06:49) Andrew: by the timeline of my life.
(02:06:55) Andrew: but the point is, where does Aly fit in?
(02:07:03) Andrew: is she the girl i love who loves me just the same?
(02:07:09) Andrew: or do i have a subconcious intention attached to it?
(02:07:46) Andrew: perhaps it is my self-sabotaging nature that creates this situation of the unattainable woman.
(02:07:50) Alex Jung: hmmmm
(02:07:59) Andrew: that, though she is perfect for me in every which way, I create a person who is already taken.
(02:08:06) Alex Jung: well
(02:08:30) Alex Jung: i theres got to be a reason why you guys met right
(02:08:53) Andrew: randomness does not have enough power to create this phenomenon.
(02:08:58) Andrew: so it must be my own.
(02:09:09) Andrew: or a higher being’s.
(02:09:21) Andrew: but either way, what can I say?
(02:10:30) Andrew: Either my intentions aren’t quite as clear, because it is drawing the intention of a situation that creates self-inflicted pain from sabotage…
(02:10:47) Andrew: or my intentions are clear, and I am supposed to wait and see.
(02:11:08) Andrew: as if, the fact that she is now taken, means she needs to go through a break up for her to truly say she loves me.
(02:11:18) Alex Jung: true true
(02:11:24) Alex Jung: but i mean you guys just met
(02:11:39) Alex Jung: so she wouldn’t just break it off just now i think
(02:11:41) Andrew: Or, a third option, this is all hogwash about intention, and i’m going crazy over pure coincidence.
(02:11:48) Alex Jung: hahaha
(02:11:50) Alex Jung: hmmm
(02:11:51) Alex Jung: or
(02:11:55) Alex Jung: you are just overthinking
(02:12:16) Alex Jung: you might just be hurting yourself by thinking to much
(02:12:24) Alex Jung: but then again thats what talking and writing is good for
(02:12:27) Alex Jung: getting out feelings
(02:12:30) Alex Jung: and analyzing them
(02:12:44) Andrew: =) and that’s why i’m an english major.
(02:12:48) Andrew: =) and so is she.
(02:13:07) Alex Jung: yaya
(02:13:18) Alex Jung: so i mean you probalby have had some time to think
(02:13:23) Alex Jung: what do you truely feel
(02:13:30) Alex Jung: usually your first thoughts
(02:13:35) Alex Jung: are close to how you feel
(02:13:38) Alex Jung: well
(02:13:39) Alex Jung: at the moment
(02:14:22) Andrew: I like her.
(02:14:41) Alex Jung: well you understand yourself
(02:14:46) Alex Jung: and i don’t think its sabatouge
(02:14:48) Andrew: she’s quirky, cares enough to debilitate herself, funny, happy.
(02:14:49) Alex Jung: to yourself
(02:15:04) Andrew: like, lemme explain.
(02:15:06) Andrew: Birthday gifts.
(02:15:10) Andrew: we were talking about this.
(02:15:28) Andrew: She thinks and overthinks so much, that she’d rather break up with a guy if she can’t figure out what birthday gift to buy.
(02:15:48) Andrew: she sabotages herself, in that sense.
(02:16:01) Andrew: which unifies with the self-damaging personality that i hide inside.
(02:16:13) Andrew: Ah, there’s a 4th option i didn’t think of.
(02:16:24) Andrew: Perhaps there’s another girl, one even MORE suited, who hasn’t appeared yet.
(02:18:29) Alex Jung: ah icic
(02:18:33) Alex Jung: well
(02:18:36) Alex Jung: for her case
(02:18:41) Alex Jung: i think she shouldn’t do that to herself
(02:18:58) Alex Jung: and in your case you will never know what will happen
(02:19:11) Alex Jung: in my mind if you keep thinking that way
(02:19:15) Alex Jung: then you will never find someone
(02:19:24) Alex Jung: since you will always be thinking there is someone better
(02:19:28) Andrew: =) exactly. but the whole point is, we’re both fixers.
(02:19:37) Andrew: she’s broken in her overthinking.
(02:19:37) Alex Jung: then thats good
(02:19:48) Alex Jung: i mean sure problems are not good
(02:19:48) Andrew: and I create that person into my life, to fix.
(02:19:55) Andrew: I create problems, intend them to exist.
(02:19:55) Alex Jung: ah icic
(02:20:01) Alex Jung: hahah
(02:20:02) Alex Jung: hmm
(02:20:04) Alex Jung: sounds like me
(02:20:05) Andrew: i intended this problematic woman to come into my life.
(02:20:21) Alex Jung: then its a good thing right
(02:20:37) Andrew: =) good in that I can relate, bad in that it is relating to something I no longer want to be.
(02:20:49) Alex Jung: true
(02:20:55) Alex Jung: but thats what you have to fix right
(02:20:58) Andrew: =)
(02:21:00) Andrew: Fix Myself.
(02:21:04) Andrew: care about Myself.
(02:21:08) Andrew: above others.
(02:21:15) Andrew: it’s a difficult thing to me.
(02:21:19) Andrew: and to you as well.
(02:22:44) Andrew: =) i don’t suppose you’d like to break down your life and figure out your inner nature and your subconscious intentions?
(02:24:22) Alex Jung: hahaha
(02:24:24) Alex Jung: that would be good
(02:24:32) Alex Jung: i would love to learn about my self
(02:24:54) Andrew: =) and be amazed by the seemingly destined and charmed life that lies ahead of you.
(02:25:08) Andrew: See, the rule is sound.
(02:25:14) Andrew: People get what they intend and want.
(02:25:23) Alex Jung: hmmm
(02:25:27) Alex Jung: in a sense right
(02:25:31) Andrew: the problem is, knowing what you want, why you want it, and whether you want things without knowing it
(02:25:47) Andrew: The problem for me, is that I do not want anything. Or rather, I want things that are bad for me.
(02:25:51) Andrew: such as, Nothing.
(02:26:13) Andrew: Did i ever recommend to you, TheSecret?
(02:28:41) Alex Jung: nope you didn’t
(02:28:59) Andrew: oiish. well, i’ll show you another time.
(02:29:07) Andrew: i think i mentioned it to you, but didn’t show it to you.
(02:29:08) Andrew: well whatever.
(02:29:11) Andrew: you get it.
(02:29:15) Andrew: Thoughts become Things.
(02:29:23) Andrew: and i have a Thought, that i should go to sleep.
(02:29:31) Alex Jung: haha well if you want to
(02:29:33) Andrew: and the thing, will be me getting some rest.
(02:29:41) Alex Jung: go for it
(02:29:44) Andrew: =) well, you talk first.
(02:29:51) Andrew: i wanna hear your comments.
(02:29:53) Andrew: and complaints.
(02:29:55) Andrew: and corrections.
(02:29:57) Andrew: and correlations.
(02:30:00) Andrew: and confirmations.
(02:30:06) Andrew: and condemnations.
(02:30:16) Andrew: and condescensions.
(02:30:21) Alex Jung: hmmmm
(02:30:40) Alex Jung: well this is your first time being in love right?
(02:30:44) Alex Jung: just asking
(02:30:52) Andrew: =) love.. such an odd word.
(02:30:55) Alex Jung: hahah
(02:30:56) Andrew: No.
(02:31:02) Alex Jung: ah kk
(02:31:07) Andrew: this is the second time I have a girl who I think fits me well enough to be called love.
(02:31:08) Alex Jung: well at least you know about it then
(02:31:11) Alex Jung: ah kk
(02:31:13) Alex Jung: well for me
(02:31:24) Alex Jung: im still surprised i still have feelings for michelle
(02:31:30) Alex Jung: its been like 3 years
(02:31:44) Alex Jung: and im like wow i’m really surprised about myself
(02:32:20) Andrew: Well, she was your first. One never forgets their first. The question is, whether you’re open enough to allow a second.
(02:33:11) Alex Jung: hmmm
(02:33:12) Alex Jung: i have been
(02:33:16) Alex Jung: for the longest time
(02:33:21) Alex Jung: been thinking about that
(02:33:35) Alex Jung: but i still don’t get how people rid these times of feelings
(02:33:50) Andrew: =) are you familiar with the law of threes?
(02:33:57) Alex Jung: nope lo
(02:33:58) Alex Jung: lol
(02:34:07) Andrew: People have to do something 3 times before they can truly understand something.
(02:34:14) Andrew: because they have a past, present, and future to compare.
(02:34:36) Andrew: the fact that you have a past, makes the present seem so close to the past.
(02:34:44) Andrew: but no future to distance yourself from it.
(02:35:10) Andrew: so you are deluded into thinking the feeling is more emotionally attached than it really is.
(02:35:21) Andrew: as a result of not having anything to distance yourself from it.
(02:36:53) Alex Jung: ah icic
(02:36:57) Andrew: it’s tough to grasp, because it means that the hurt you are feeling, only hurts because you aren’t used to not feeling it.
(02:37:05) Alex Jung: hahah
(02:37:15) Alex Jung: thought i’ve felt a bit of pain for 3 years
(02:37:20) Alex Jung: so i’m pretty sure i have felt it
(02:37:22) Alex Jung: lopl
(02:37:53) Andrew: =) what’s wrong with thinking a better girl might come along?
(02:38:16) Alex Jung: nothing at all
(02:38:27) Alex Jung: i have been thinking about that
(02:38:36) Alex Jung: but still i have the same feelings
(02:38:55) Andrew: =) then hold on to it.
(02:38:59) Andrew: for as long as you can.
(02:39:03) Andrew: because time will come to take it away.
(02:39:06) Andrew: as it always does.
(02:39:14) Alex Jung: haha
(02:39:15) Andrew: and with it, it’ll bring a new girl into your life.
(02:39:15) Alex Jung: hmmm
(02:39:20) Alex Jung: i hope so
(02:39:21) Alex Jung: lol
(02:39:30) Andrew: =) that’s a constant of life.
(02:39:33) Andrew: that things always change.
(02:39:36) Alex Jung: ya
(02:39:41) Alex Jung: but its been 3 years haha
(02:39:49) Alex Jung: i’ve been looking for change
(02:40:11) Andrew: =) that means it matters more, so it’ll take longer to convince yourself it no longer does as much.
(02:40:34) Andrew: =) would you say you are.. looking for change to alleviate the pain?
(02:40:43) Andrew: or looking for change, to bring happiness where the pain used to be?
(02:42:20) Andrew: because the two are different, and it reflects your mindset.
(02:42:45) Andrew: if it is looking for change to alleviate pain, then it is focusing on the Pain, and drawing attention to it’s intention on yourself.
(02:42:58) Andrew: in which case, it will remain, because that which you resist, persists.
(02:43:13) Alex Jung: true true
(02:43:19) Alex Jung: in truth im not sure why i do this
(02:43:24) Alex Jung: or feel this way
(02:43:26) Alex Jung: love
(02:43:28) Alex Jung: pain
(02:43:32) Alex Jung: uncertaintity
(02:43:57) Andrew: you want me to give you my theory?
(02:44:24) Alex Jung: kk
(02:44:46) Andrew: I think, that it all stems from a feeling of Chivalry.
(02:45:09) Andrew: Chivalry, meaning to exert kindness and be the shoulder to lean on
(02:45:12) Andrew: the nice guy.
(02:45:26) Andrew: I think, that has become your purpose.
(02:45:34) Andrew: or more appropriately, your meaning
(02:45:56) Andrew: and because of it, the Chivalrous man needs situations to exert kindness.
(02:46:04) Andrew: in which case, situations where kindness is needed.
(02:46:10) Andrew: situations where things are unkind.
(02:46:52) Andrew: This belief is spread throughout your life, and when there isn’t a situation, you lose your sense of self.
(02:47:03) Alex Jung: ah icic
(02:47:10) Alex Jung: that sounds interesting
(02:47:18) Andrew: such as, when there isn’t a woman in your life for you to be kind to.
(02:47:23) Andrew: for you to be the good boyfriend to.
(02:47:37) Alex Jung: haha icic
(02:47:45) Andrew: that’s where the pain, or loneliness comes from.
(02:47:50) Andrew: not the loss of the woman.
(02:48:02) Andrew: but the loss of a person to be the knight in shining armor for.
(02:48:51) Alex Jung: hahaha
(02:49:17) Andrew: So then, are you the Knight in Shining armor, and would you like to stay the Stoic Soldier?
(02:49:33) Andrew: Or would you like to adjust your meaning, and have meaning without being dependent on others?
(02:49:33) Alex Jung: what do you mean stoic soldier
(02:49:38) Alex Jung: ah
(02:49:39) Alex Jung: ya
(02:49:44) Alex Jung: the latter sounds good
(02:49:59) Andrew: Stoic soldier, as if you can Take the feeling of loneliness and even though there’s no one to help, you help those you can.
(02:50:06) Andrew: as if you can handle the pain.
(02:50:28) Andrew: =) Adjust your meaning, then, My friend.
(02:50:39) Alex Jung: hmmm
(02:50:45) Alex Jung: though both sounds right
(02:50:50) Andrew: Reorganize your mind to intend something other than a problem to fix.
(02:50:58) Andrew: =) both Are right, there is no Wrong answer.
(02:51:05) Andrew: see, that’s the beauty of this great secret.
(02:51:15) Andrew: There is no such thing as a Wrong intention.
(02:51:21) Andrew: It’s a choice.
(02:51:24) Andrew: you choose the intention.
(02:51:36) Andrew: no one is going to judge you and say you made a bad decision.
(02:51:41) Andrew: it’s YOUR decision to make!
(02:51:51) Andrew: any judging and guilt is from Yourself.
(02:51:58) Andrew: and any power to change comes from within.
(02:52:07) Andrew: =) but i get what you mean.
(02:52:09) Andrew: both sound awesome.
(02:52:26) Andrew: to be the Stoic Soldier, or the Happy Helper that is more than just a fixer.
(02:52:36) Andrew: as if you can be happy without having something to fix.
(02:52:43) Andrew: Honestly, that is why you and I are similar.
(02:52:49) Andrew: Though, i’ve gone the stoic solider route.
(02:53:01) Andrew: and i’m happy because it’s my choice to do it.
(02:53:08) Alex Jung: ah
(02:53:09) Alex Jung: icic
(02:53:12) Alex Jung: very true
(02:53:21) Alex Jung: im not sure what i want
(02:53:30) Andrew: =) take your time, took me many years.
(02:53:47) Andrew: I also want to believe that i’ve isolated the key to happiness.
(02:53:58) Andrew: it lies in what i just said.
(02:54:09) Andrew: “being happy because it is my choice to be miserable”
(02:54:13) Andrew: Choice.
(02:54:16) Andrew: Freedom of choosing.
(02:54:18) Andrew: Freedom.
(02:54:27) Andrew: To not be manipulated.
(02:54:48) Andrew: To be allowed to act separately, if it is desired.
(02:54:57) Andrew: I think that’s the key to happiness.
(02:55:07) Andrew: Because I broke it down when we thought about this fact.
(02:55:16) Andrew: That, once a certain level of income is met, money no longer makes you happy.
(02:55:31) Andrew: Then it means, What is the money for, that makes the money useless after having enough of it?
(02:55:44) Andrew: I figured, well, Money buys stuff.
(02:56:03) Andrew: and also, People like stuff.
(02:56:17) Andrew: So, people like people With stuff.
(02:56:24) Andrew: but that’s even more simple.
(02:56:27) Andrew: People like People.
(02:56:34) Andrew: and they Wish to be liked.
(02:56:40) Andrew: People wish to belong.
(02:56:56) Andrew: People wish to be interconnected, with their neighbors, and each other.
(02:57:19) Alex Jung: yaya
(02:57:22) Alex Jung: thats how i feel
(02:57:23) Andrew: That, is the unifying and underlying desire that brings happiness.
(02:57:29) Andrew: it’s so simple.
(02:58:01) Andrew: Money is used not to make people feel happy while being alone, but to seem likable enough to the people they want them to like.
(02:58:42) Andrew: Interconnectedness.
(02:58:45) Andrew: I’ve been looking.
(02:58:53) Andrew: I can’t find anything like this written anywhere.
(02:58:57) Andrew: no book describes this.
(02:59:03) Andrew: No study highlights it.
(02:59:08) Andrew: So i think, I’ll write it.
(02:59:23) Andrew: eventually, when the right words come to me.
(02:59:51) Andrew: and who knows, maybe people will understand, and the world will live in harmony by knowing how to be happy and how easy it is to attain.
(03:00:06) Andrew: Or maybe i’ll just end up with a heavy paperweight.
(03:00:17) Alex Jung: well things are never certain in life haha
(03:00:21) Andrew: =) either way, it’s fun for me to consider and think of. =P
(03:00:27) Alex Jung: haha ya
(03:00:30) Alex Jung: true
(03:00:32) Alex Jung: hmmmmm
(03:00:44) Alex Jung: so what do you think is the best route to clear ones feelings of the past
(03:00:48) Alex Jung: im sure you have done that
(03:01:02) Andrew: mmm..
(03:01:04) Andrew: the past.
(03:01:09) Andrew: well..
(03:01:13) Andrew: this is going to sound insane.
(03:01:25) Andrew: but imagine the end of your future.
(03:01:34) Andrew: Your death.
(03:01:34) Alex Jung: like the end of my life
(03:01:35) Alex Jung: ah
(03:01:36) Alex Jung: kk
(03:01:36) Andrew: yep.
(03:01:40) Andrew: imagine that for a second.
(03:01:42) Alex Jung: wait
(03:01:44) Alex Jung: hahah
(03:01:47) Alex Jung: that just makes me
(03:01:57) Alex Jung: want to love her even more
(03:02:02) Andrew: =) just bear with me.
(03:02:07) Alex Jung: hahha
(03:02:08) Alex Jung: kk
(03:02:12) Andrew: Imagine your death.
(03:02:15) Andrew: you’re in a hospital.
(03:02:19) Andrew: there’s a curtain drawn.
(03:02:23) Andrew: it’s late at night.
(03:02:27) Andrew: you take your last breath.
(03:02:28) Andrew: you die.
(03:02:41) Andrew: Now, imagine another person.
(03:02:48) Andrew: Say they are in the bed next to you.
(03:02:53) Andrew: Think about their life.
(03:02:59) Andrew: all the possibilities.
(03:03:03) Andrew: all the great feats.
(03:03:06) Andrew: all the great defeats.
(03:03:11) Andrew: all the accomplishments
(03:03:17) Andrew: and all the failures.
(03:03:23) Andrew: for one thing, you dont know a thing about this person.
(03:03:27) Andrew: you dont know
(03:03:29) Andrew: they could be good
(03:03:32) Andrew: they could be bad.
(03:03:35) Andrew: all you know
(03:03:38) Andrew: is that they’re dead
(03:03:41) Andrew: alongside with you.
(03:03:46) Andrew: Then let’s go big picture.
(03:03:55) Alex Jung: kk
(03:03:56) Andrew: Imagine all 11billion people in the world.
(03:04:05) Andrew: all those possibilities.
(03:04:08) Andrew: all those possible heros
(03:04:11) Andrew: all those possible villians.
(03:04:13) Andrew: every hitler
(03:04:15) Andrew: every ghandi
(03:04:22) Andrew: every murderer
(03:04:24) Andrew: every savior.
(03:04:29) Andrew: all gone.
(03:04:33) Andrew: in a blink of an eye.
(03:04:36) Andrew: everyone dies.
(03:04:41) Andrew: That.. is humbling.
(03:04:46) Andrew: to know that Your one life.
(03:04:55) Andrew: compared to 11billion or so other lives.
(03:05:02) Andrew: is equal.
(03:05:04) Andrew: See?
(03:05:10) Andrew: not insignificant.
(03:05:13) Andrew: that’d be untrue.
(03:05:22) Andrew: but Equally Significant, Equally full of Possibility.
(03:05:48) Alex Jung: ah
(03:05:48) Andrew: Humanity may be a mere life form on this pale blue dot filled with many other dots in the galaxy,
(03:05:57) Andrew: but Humanity is capable of great things.
(03:06:01) Alex Jung: very true
(03:06:14) Andrew: and we are all Equal in that greatness of possibility.
(03:06:21) Andrew: Everyone with life, has potential.
(03:06:34) Alex Jung: yaya i agree with that
(03:06:43) Andrew: So let’s go back to you.
(03:06:44) Andrew: and your Past.
(03:06:52) Andrew: and remember what i told you
(03:06:57) Andrew: Everything, is a choice.
(03:07:18) Alex Jung: ya
(03:07:21) Alex Jung: everything is
(03:07:25) Andrew: the question is whether or not you choose so willingly, and steadfastly, without any exception.
(03:07:33) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:07:35) Alex Jung: true
(03:07:39) Andrew: So if you are having difficultly letting go of the past.
(03:07:46) Andrew: it is you choosing Not to Let Go of the Past.
(03:07:55) Alex Jung: haha i know
(03:07:56) Andrew: Back to big picture now.
(03:07:56) Alex Jung: i know
(03:08:00) Andrew: All those lives.
(03:08:04) Andrew: imagine
(03:08:09) Andrew: how many of them
(03:08:17) Andrew: have lost love that they thought would be eternal?
(03:08:36) Andrew: that automatically takes less meaning in it.
(03:08:42) Andrew: or rather, takes less of the false meaning away from it
(03:08:45) Andrew: away from yourself.
(03:08:56) Andrew: no longer inflated from Universal size.
(03:09:04) Andrew: but shrunk down to planetary, along with the rest of the planet.
(03:09:11) Andrew: You are not the center of a universe.
(03:09:33) Andrew: You are the forever rotating planet.
(03:09:51) Andrew: always equal with the rest of the particles in the planet.
(03:09:58) Andrew: so, you have given yourself False meaning.
(03:10:01) Andrew: False importance.
(03:10:07) Andrew: Your love, is a false importance.
(03:10:26) Andrew: in the grand scheme, it is not important enough to matter.
(03:10:33) Andrew: Just as, You are not important enough to matter.
(03:10:37) Andrew: Which is why, this one statement.
(03:11:00) Andrew: “You are both Significant, and Insignificant.”
(03:11:02) Andrew: is true.
(03:11:09) Andrew: Nothing matters, and everything matters.
(03:11:13) Andrew: it’s all a game.
(03:11:17) Andrew: and you pick and choose.
(03:11:22) Andrew: as you please.
(03:11:33) Andrew: and when you are clear in your mind, you can do so with ease.
(03:11:51) Andrew: Put simply,
(03:12:12) Andrew: she does not matter enough to keep around, if you choose to make something else matter more.
(03:12:36) Andrew: “choose to make something else matter more”
(03:12:42) Andrew: forget about “forgetting the past”
(03:12:50) Andrew: just “choose to make something else matter more”
(03:12:55) Andrew: that’s how you move on.
(03:13:14) Andrew: that’s the whole.. kicking the addiction.
(03:13:31) Andrew: an addiction is very simple
(03:13:46) Alex Jung: haha icic
(03:13:52) Alex Jung: makes sense
(03:14:02) Andrew: does it? i think i got lost myself.
(03:14:08) Andrew: it’s so difficult to grasp for myself.
(03:14:15) Alex Jung: hahah i can kinda see where this going
(03:14:17) Andrew: i cant’ believe you’d understand my insanity.
(03:14:29) Alex Jung: thats one thing people like me for
(03:14:31) Alex Jung: im understanding
(03:14:54) Andrew: =) i’m over-thinking. but I think something this broad requires it.
(03:15:04) Alex Jung: though what i don’t get is why my mind would choose to not let go even though i know there probalby is someone out there
(03:15:10) Alex Jung: i can see what i have to do
(03:15:13) Andrew: hmm.
(03:15:13) Alex Jung: i know what i must do
(03:15:17) Alex Jung: but
(03:15:25) Andrew: perhaps it’s fear of saving yourself?
(03:15:31) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:15:45) Andrew: as in, you do not want to let her go, because if you do, you will be fixed.
(03:15:46) Andrew: better.
(03:15:49) Andrew: healed.
(03:15:52) Alex Jung: haha
(03:15:54) Alex Jung: isn’t that
(03:15:57) Alex Jung: a good thing
(03:16:06) Andrew: The Knight in shining armor is riddled with holes and scars.
(03:16:18) Andrew: the armor is the front.
(03:16:30) Andrew: you saving yourself is shedding the armor.
(03:16:37) Andrew: and leaving only the holes and scars.
(03:16:41) Andrew: bringing them to light.
(03:16:52) Andrew: your mind does not want to bring that to light.
(03:17:21) Andrew: what scars though..
(03:17:38) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:18:03) Alex Jung: i don’t know. i guess i felt that at that time when i was in love that it was the best feeling in my life
(03:18:14) Alex Jung: i found pure happiness
(03:18:22) Alex Jung: and a will to live for something
(03:18:37) Andrew: what damage has occurred as a result of you being the protector, the good boyfriend , the helping hand.
(03:18:43) Andrew: got it.
(03:18:49) Andrew: dependency
(03:18:53) Andrew: Will to live for.
(03:19:17) Andrew: If she is insignificant, in that she is equally important but false, then it’ll fall through when it disappears.
(03:19:43) Alex Jung: hmm
(03:19:52) Andrew: pure happiness can only be achieved through self-realization and self-delusion.
(03:20:13) Andrew: Happiness is not attained from having something to be happy about, but being happy with having nothing.
(03:20:21) Alex Jung: haha true
(03:20:24) Alex Jung: i understand that part
(03:20:26) Andrew: because Nothing, means you have Everything you already need.
(03:20:37) Alex Jung: hmm that will be hard for me though
(03:20:45) Andrew: yes, it’s certainly difficult.
(03:21:09) Andrew: The self-detrimentals are cursed with a long road.
(03:21:21) Alex Jung: ya
(03:21:30) Alex Jung: the road to happiness is always a hard one
(03:21:33) Andrew: but it is us who realize it ahead of those who follow false lies.
(03:21:44) Alex Jung: ya
(03:21:56) Andrew: so, it’s a win, in my book.
(03:22:02) Alex Jung: haha ya
(03:22:08) Alex Jung: do you think i need to be more selfish
(03:22:16) Alex Jung: insted of so giving
(03:22:24) Andrew: =) you and I both, but it’s more difficult than just selfishness.
(03:22:43) Alex Jung: what else is there?
(03:22:45) Andrew: see, Hoarding, is not the same as not taking.
(03:22:54) Andrew: or Not giving.
(03:23:05) Andrew: The problem you and I have, is not the Not giving part.
(03:23:11) Andrew: the problem, is the Not taking part.
(03:23:16) Andrew: One has to take, as well as give.
(03:23:20) Andrew: one cannot JUST give.
(03:23:42) Andrew: as far as being more selfish..
(03:23:53) Alex Jung: ah ya
(03:23:55) Andrew: i recommend being less self-less.
(03:23:56) Alex Jung: that is true
(03:23:59) Alex Jung: o
(03:24:02) Alex Jung: kk
(03:24:05) Alex Jung: ya
(03:24:13) Alex Jung: someone did tell me once to take more
(03:24:22) Andrew: think of yourself more, but continue to give.
(03:24:28) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:24:42) Alex Jung: hard to do though when all i love to do is help
(03:24:52) Andrew: =) and that’s the Dependency and the Fixer mentality.
(03:25:03) Andrew: which I also have residing in me.
(03:25:13) Andrew: so, I am not perfect.
(03:25:21) Alex Jung: haha
(03:25:24) Alex Jung: no one is perfect
(03:25:32) Andrew: but I’ve gotten to the point where I’m happy with attempting perfection.
(03:25:39) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:25:42) Alex Jung: perfection
(03:25:45) Alex Jung: i don’t mind that
(03:25:57) Alex Jung: but i think sometimes it makes me unhappy
(03:26:15) Andrew: =) perfection needs to be defined better.
(03:26:21) Andrew: it is not “the absence of mistakes”
(03:26:35) Alex Jung: hmm ya
(03:26:45) Alex Jung: though for me its just striving to be better than i am or just a better person
(03:26:50) Alex Jung: even if i know im a good person
(03:26:59) Andrew: but more so, “the cummulative pinnacle of possibility from accepting and adjusting all difficulties and mistakes that may occur”
(03:27:38) Alex Jung: ya
(03:27:48) Alex Jung: its so hard though hahaha
(03:27:57) Andrew: =) no one ever said being Good was easy.
(03:27:58) Alex Jung: i have such a good memory where i can relive everything
(03:28:01) Alex Jung: every mistake
(03:28:02) Andrew: but it’s because it’s hard that makes it fun.
(03:28:07) Alex Jung: ya
(03:28:11) Alex Jung: its a challeage
(03:28:15) Andrew: a purpose.
(03:28:19) Alex Jung: ya
(03:28:22) Alex Jung: but at the same time
(03:28:25) Alex Jung: i feel some guilt
(03:28:31) Andrew: The Guilt of the Good.
(03:28:33) Andrew: yup.
(03:28:42) Alex Jung: its good
(03:28:45) Alex Jung: for learning and understanding
(03:28:50) Alex Jung: but having a bit for 3 years
(03:28:55) Alex Jung: it makes me worry
(03:29:13) Andrew: you worry it’ll never vanish?
(03:29:26) Alex Jung: in a sense
(03:29:37) Alex Jung: but the thing is i have made many mistakes where i have felt guilt
(03:29:50) Alex Jung: but for some reason this certain guilt that i have had for 3 years has not gone away
(03:30:00) Andrew: what do you have to feel guilty about?
(03:30:06) Andrew: not being a better boyfriend?
(03:30:10) Andrew: that’s absurd.
(03:30:16) Alex Jung: i feel guilt
(03:30:25) Alex Jung: for hurting her feelings
(03:30:44) Andrew: interesting..
(03:31:06) Andrew: guilt would certainly keep it around longer.
(03:31:14) Alex Jung: ya
(03:31:19) Andrew: but then there’s the answer.
(03:31:23) Andrew: You’ve inflicted pain.
(03:31:33) Alex Jung: ya
(03:31:34) Andrew: so, as punishment, you must relive it.
(03:31:37) Alex Jung: haha
(03:31:39) Alex Jung: ya
(03:31:47) Alex Jung: i think thats why i like to suffer
(03:31:49) Andrew: Which is clear, as you waht you intend.
(03:31:50) Andrew: yep
(03:31:51) Andrew: exactly
(03:31:56) Andrew: You intend suffering upon yourself.
(03:32:00) Alex Jung: ya
(03:32:11) Alex Jung: as punishment
(03:32:14) Andrew: so, that’s the first step.
(03:32:16) Andrew: Forgiveness.
(03:32:23) Alex Jung: hmm ya
(03:32:29) Andrew: =) i think that’s enough for one night.
(03:32:34) Alex Jung: hahaha kk
(03:32:40) Alex Jung: i’ll talk to you later then!
(03:32:41) Alex Jung: =)
(03:32:48) Andrew: =) absolutely
(03:32:49) Andrew: and remember.
(03:32:53) Andrew: This isn’t an exact science.
(03:32:57) Andrew: i could be terribly wrong.
(03:32:58) Alex Jung: haha
(03:32:58) Alex Jung: ya
(03:33:01) Alex Jung: but
(03:33:03) Alex Jung: it makes sense
(03:33:04) Alex Jung: to me
(03:33:07) Alex Jung: and i feel its right
(03:33:12) Andrew: =) I try.
(03:33:22) Alex Jung: yaya
(03:33:26) Alex Jung: well goodnight! =)
(03:33:29) Andrew: Actually, really quick, I wanna leave you with one last thing.
(03:33:32) Alex Jung: o
(03:33:32) Alex Jung: kk
(03:33:38) Andrew: First, is Forgiving yourself.
(03:33:47) Andrew: Then, is creating a healthy attachment to life.
(03:33:50) Alex Jung: haha
(03:33:52) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:33:55) Alex Jung: ya
(03:33:56) Andrew: Which means, finding things you Want.
(03:34:04) Andrew: my Seven for example.
(03:34:08) Alex Jung: ah
(03:34:09) Alex Jung: well
(03:34:19) Andrew: you can use and adjust my seven as you like. =)
(03:34:24) Andrew: just soemthing to think about.
(03:34:27) Alex Jung: haha well some of it is the same
(03:34:27) Andrew: or even ask for 12.
(03:34:32) Andrew: =)
(03:34:34) Andrew: but remember
(03:34:37) Andrew: Simple is easier.
(03:34:42) Andrew: and basic.
(03:34:48) Alex Jung: haha ya
(03:34:58) Andrew: The universe always finds the quickest, shortest, most harmonious way between you, and what you want.
(03:35:07) Alex Jung: haha ya
(03:35:08) Andrew: so make it easy for the universe. =)
(03:35:18) Alex Jung: though what if you want something that seems so hard to get
(03:35:28) Alex Jung: because although moving on
(03:35:31) Alex Jung: and ridding feelings
(03:35:33) Alex Jung: and such
(03:35:34) Andrew: =) i’m sure the difficulty is a lie.
(03:35:35) Andrew: OH
(03:35:37) Andrew: one other thing
(03:35:40) Andrew: Adjust your typinpg
(03:35:42) Andrew: and talking
(03:35:43) Andrew: and writing
(03:35:46) Andrew: to focus on the positive.
(03:35:47) Alex Jung: o
(03:35:49) Alex Jung: hahah
(03:35:53) Andrew: so if you want to Get rid of feelings.
(03:36:00) Andrew: it means you want to Immerse yourself in Good Feelings.
(03:36:02) Alex Jung: well my typing of feelings is good
(03:36:09) Alex Jung: my speaking is not
(03:36:19) Alex Jung: i don’t like burdening people with my feelings
(03:36:33) Alex Jung: when they have other things to worry about in life
(03:36:40) Andrew: =) hence, the Guilt of the Good.
(03:36:44) Alex Jung: ya
(03:36:45) Andrew: Which was the title of my first book.
(03:36:49) Alex Jung: haha ya
(03:36:50) Andrew: which we played scattergories.
(03:36:55) Andrew: and i brought up.
(03:37:05) Alex Jung: ya
(03:37:07) Andrew: though, i don’t quite know anymore =)
(03:37:20) Andrew: Hey. Want me to put this convo up on the blog?
(03:37:20) Alex Jung: well i know we all seek love
(03:37:23) Alex Jung: o
(03:37:26) Alex Jung: you could if you want
(03:37:30) Alex Jung: but as i was saying
(03:37:52) Alex Jung: we all seek love but what happens if you love someone who doesn’t love you back
(03:37:53) Alex Jung: actually
(03:38:13) Alex Jung: ah nvm
(03:38:15) Alex Jung: i realized
(03:38:20) Alex Jung: that aly probalby likes you
(03:38:33) Andrew: =) where’s this coming from all of a sudden?
(03:38:37) Andrew: Let me clarify.
(03:38:41) Andrew: You are to leave it up to the universe.
(03:38:49) Andrew: The universe knows.
(03:38:57) Andrew: Though you do not, the universe will show.
(03:39:04) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:39:14) Alex Jung: so in a sense the universe wants me to suffer for now
(03:39:28) Andrew: =) in a sense, You want you to suffer, so the universe gives you what you want.
(03:39:35) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:39:40) Alex Jung: icic
(03:39:49) Alex Jung: but im not sure constant thinking about her is a good thing
(03:39:58) Andrew: So if someone doesn’t love you back, then it either means that the person that you attracted isn’t quite in line with your conscious desires.
(03:40:10) Andrew: or, that the person herself does not yet know that she is right for you.
(03:40:18) Andrew: Either way, it is no longer in your court to say.
(03:40:24) Alex Jung: hahaha
(03:40:26) Alex Jung: icic
(03:40:30) Andrew: Leave it up to the universe, after releasing your intentional intentions.
(03:40:30) Alex Jung: that makes a lot of sense to me
(03:40:43) Andrew: =) that’s why this Secret really got to me.
(03:40:45) Andrew: it made SENSE.
(03:40:57) Andrew: logically.
(03:41:01) Andrew: and in practice.
(03:41:07) Andrew: in my life, so much has happened.
(03:41:11) Andrew: and I know why now.
(03:41:15) Andrew: my relations
(03:41:21) Andrew: the people i have around
(03:41:23) Andrew: and the way i act
(03:41:28) Andrew: break down Everything.
(03:41:39) Alex Jung: icic
(03:41:41) Alex Jung: interesting
(03:41:41) Andrew: it’s insane, but it’s the best way to be .. A Creator.
(03:41:47) Andrew: Which is like.. Godlike.
(03:41:53) Andrew: Which is almost Blasphemous to say.
(03:42:01) Alex Jung: hahah
(03:42:02) Alex Jung: so
(03:42:04) Andrew: but who’s to say God doesn’t have that power?
(03:42:07) Andrew: OH
(03:42:09) Andrew: HOLY SHIT
(03:42:12) Andrew: What if GOD HAS THAT POWER.
(03:42:18) Andrew: GOD IS HUMAN, with the power to CREATE.
(03:42:24) Alex Jung: hmm maybe
(03:42:35) Alex Jung: wouldn’t count that idea out
(03:42:39) Andrew: creeeeepy.
(03:42:43) Andrew: i didn’t think of that.
(03:42:46) Andrew: mindblown.
(03:42:51) Andrew: universeoverload.
(03:42:53) Andrew: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
(03:42:59) Andrew: i need sleep
(03:43:00) Andrew: so do you.
(03:43:05) Alex Jung: so destiny takes us down a path and yet we our selves can create destiny
(03:43:11) Andrew: Yep Yep.
(03:43:20) Alex Jung: hm
(03:43:20) Andrew: I wrote this down somewhere.
(03:43:22) Andrew: The Source.
(03:43:24) Alex Jung: interesting
(03:43:30) Andrew: The source is Limiteless energy.
(03:43:38) Andrew: and we take that energy, and make things happen with it.
(03:43:46) Andrew: The source is neither good nor bad.
(03:43:52) Andrew: and this is where evil comes in.
(03:44:10) Andrew: People who Are evil, are brought about by people who fear evil.
(03:44:25) Andrew: because it is in being afraid of it, that you give meaning to it.
(03:44:29) Andrew: you focus on it.
(03:44:33) Andrew: so someone,
(03:44:35) Andrew: maybe the first
(03:44:42) Andrew: if you wanna get biblical
(03:44:44) Andrew: The Snake
(03:44:49) Andrew: the Apple.
(03:45:03) Andrew: Fear the indecency of being naked in Eden.
(03:45:11) Andrew: Brings about the evils of the world.
(03:45:14) Andrew: daaamn.
(03:45:22) Andrew: okay.
(03:45:27) Andrew: too much mindblown for one night.
(03:45:39) Andrew: OH
(03:45:40) Andrew: wait
(03:45:42) Andrew: michelle told me this
(03:45:46) Andrew: you joined a church in riverside?
(03:45:53) Andrew: whats the church called?
(03:46:40) Alex Jung: well its a fellowship group
(03:47:04) Alex Jung: and how did i become a topic
(03:47:07) Alex Jung: for discussion lol
(03:47:14) Andrew: =) sorry, lemme backtrack
(03:47:15) Andrew: Gracepoint
(03:47:22) Andrew: went down to riverside
(03:47:29) Andrew: and started a church there.
(03:47:35) Andrew: i was just wondering if its the same church.
(03:47:40) Alex Jung: ya
(03:47:44) Andrew: LOL
(03:47:46) Andrew: lmaooooo
(03:47:50) Andrew: we’re in the same fellowship!
(03:47:51) Andrew: ahahah
(03:47:56) Andrew: wait
(03:48:01) Andrew: then you should know Jammy Yang.
(03:48:09) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:48:15) Alex Jung: yang
(03:48:20) Alex Jung: ya
(03:48:23) Andrew: LMFAO
(03:48:25) Andrew: ahahahaha
(03:48:25) Andrew: okay
(03:48:26) Andrew: so
(03:48:30) Andrew: we’ve been talking about this
(03:48:35) Andrew: in berkeley
(03:48:37) Andrew: Gracepoint
(03:48:43) Alex Jung: the fellowship group has?
(03:48:43) Andrew: apparently
(03:48:53) Andrew: wha?
(03:49:02) Alex Jung: go on
(03:49:05) Alex Jung: you were talking about
(03:49:15) Alex Jung: or the group was talking about
(03:49:19) Andrew: well, apparently, jammy Yang goes to Riverside Gracepoint, originally from Berkeley, and originally from Irvine.
(03:49:23) Andrew: AND
(03:49:36) Andrew: A Jammy Yang taught me Pre-Algebra at Will C Wood Middle School.
(03:49:53) Alex Jung: hahaa
(03:49:54) Alex Jung: icic
(03:49:57) Andrew: SOOOO
(03:49:59) Andrew: lmaoo
(03:50:06) Andrew: thats awesome
(03:50:07) Andrew: almost..
(03:50:13) Alex Jung: lol
(03:50:14) Andrew: serendipitously awesome.
(03:50:22) Alex Jung: lol
(03:50:23) Alex Jung: ya
(03:50:26) Andrew: woww.
(03:50:31) Alex Jung: hmmm
(03:50:38) Andrew: people said hes coming up for thanksgiving.
(03:50:51) Alex Jung: hahaha
(03:50:51) Andrew: but thats so awesome.
(03:50:55) Andrew: woww
(03:51:01) Andrew: i[m just so mindblown right now
(03:51:11) Andrew: my brain is going to shut off the second i hit the bed.
(03:51:16) Alex Jung: haha
(03:51:17) Alex Jung: hmm
(03:51:18) Alex Jung: wondering
(03:51:32) Alex Jung: how did me joinging a fellowship come in your conversation lol
(03:51:35) Andrew: OH
(03:51:37) Alex Jung: so random
(03:51:38) Andrew: uhh
(03:51:40) Andrew: Church
(03:51:41) Andrew: God
(03:51:42) Andrew: Snake
(03:51:44) Andrew: adam and eve
(03:51:45) Andrew: naked
(03:51:46) Andrew: eden
(03:51:54) Andrew: I have associative memory.
(03:51:56) Alex Jung: haha
(03:52:04) Andrew: One trigger cascades all the rest of my thoughts.
(03:52:11) Alex Jung: hahahah
(03:52:12) Andrew: I think that’s also why I suck at math.
(03:52:15) Alex Jung: o
(03:52:15) Alex Jung: haha
(03:52:21) Andrew: Cause Numbers have no association, it’s too random.
(03:52:26) Alex Jung: lol
(03:52:30) Andrew: Too many possible connections.
(03:52:35) Alex Jung: hahaha
(03:52:36) Alex Jung: ya
(03:52:53) Andrew: I mean, I have number associations based upon other things.
(03:52:53) Alex Jung: i think we should get some sleep now haha
(03:52:57) Alex Jung: ya
(03:52:58) Andrew: but that’s for another time
(03:53:03) Alex Jung: its almost 4
(03:53:04) Alex Jung: lol
(03:53:10) Andrew: 4,7,11,17,23,47,74.
(03:53:12) Andrew: WOAH
(03:53:15) Andrew: how the hell did i type that much.
(03:53:19) Andrew: k
(03:53:20) Andrew: im dead.
(03:53:25) Alex Jung: haha
(03:53:26) Alex Jung: kk
(03:53:30) Andrew: whew.
(03:53:33) Andrew: we’ll talk more later.
(03:53:38) Andrew: after a lot of rest.
(03:53:42) Alex Jung: haha kk
(03:53:46) Andrew: i’ll put this up
(03:53:48) Alex Jung: kk
(03:53:50) Alex Jung: sounds good
(03:53:52) Andrew: just cause its weirdly serendipitous.
(03:53:56) Alex Jung: ahahahaha
(03:54:06) Andrew: I mean, I’m supposed to go to the church Today.
(03:54:09) Andrew: at 7pm.
(03:54:12) Alex Jung: lol
(03:54:13) Alex Jung: icic
(03:54:16) Andrew: ahhh
(03:54:17) Andrew: okay
(03:54:21) Andrew: we’ll talk later.
(03:54:23) Alex Jung: kk
(03:54:26) Alex Jung: goodnight
(03:54:29) Alex Jung: =)
(03:54:35) Andrew: Goodnight. =)
(03:54:35) Andrew: OH
(03:54:36) Andrew: wait
(03:54:37) Andrew: uhh
(03:54:42) Andrew: i also recommend music
(03:54:47) Andrew: it clears the head.
(03:54:48) Andrew: wait no
(03:54:49) Andrew: not music
(03:54:52) Andrew: It’s called
(03:54:55) Andrew: Meditation stuff
(03:54:58) Andrew: i have it on a HD
(03:54:58) Alex Jung: o kk
(03:55:04) Andrew: i’ll give it to you sometime
(03:55:06) Andrew: remind me.
(03:55:07) Alex Jung: kk
(03:55:11) Alex Jung: sounds good
(03:55:15) Andrew: it’s supposed to reorganize your thinking or something
(03:55:19) Andrew: I used it for about 7 months.
(03:55:20) Andrew: and stopped
(03:55:22) Andrew: they have like..
(03:55:27) Andrew: 20 years worth of listening.
(03:55:29) Andrew: or wahtever.
(03:55:34) Alex Jung: hhahahah
(03:55:35) Alex Jung: kk
(03:55:41) Andrew: but I think i’m reorganized enough to not care about more reorganizing.
(03:55:50) Andrew: yeah, so i hope i was helpful
(03:56:05) Alex Jung: ya
(03:56:08) Alex Jung: you were
(03:56:37) Alex Jung: though the question is when will i be able to feel all this
(03:56:43) Alex Jung: 3 years has gone by
(03:56:46) Alex Jung: so im still waiting
(03:57:36) Andrew: =) focusing on the feeling that is there, allows it to persist. Instead, draw your attention elsewhere, and I will assist.
(03:57:49) Alex Jung: hmmm kk
(03:58:02) Andrew: basically, forget waiting for the pain to disappear, try to be happy while ignoring the pain.
(03:58:10) Alex Jung: hmm
(03:58:11) Andrew: and the pain will go away when you ignore it.
(03:58:11) Alex Jung: kk
(03:58:17) Alex Jung: hahah
(03:58:17) Alex Jung: kk
(03:58:21) Alex Jung: makes sense
(03:58:22) Andrew: =) yaaaaaa.
(03:58:27) Andrew: 2 more min
(03:58:29) Andrew: lets wait it out
(03:58:33) Alex Jung: hahah kk
(03:58:38) Andrew: whewww.
(03:58:47) Andrew: i have to wake up so early..
(03:59:12) Alex Jung: lol
(03:59:14) Alex Jung: what time
(03:59:18) Andrew: 8:30
(03:59:19) Andrew: shower
(03:59:21) Andrew: then its 9
(03:59:26) Andrew: then i go run to alameda library
(03:59:28) Andrew: return a book
(03:59:31) Andrew: then catch my bus at 10
(03:59:34) Alex Jung: lol
(03:59:34) Andrew: get to berkeley at 11
(03:59:37) Andrew: go do financial aid
(03:59:41) Andrew: it’ll be 11:30 12
(03:59:45) Andrew: class at 1:30
(03:59:47) Andrew: ends at 5
(03:59:50) Andrew: then church at 7
(03:59:53) Andrew: so i have 2 hours to chill
(03:59:58) Andrew: probably sleep at Jessie’s place
(04:00:03) Andrew: then home around 11.
(04:00:05) Andrew: woo
(04:00:06) Andrew: its 4
(04:00:07) Alex Jung: lol
(04:00:10) Alex Jung: ya
(04:00:11) Andrew: and i finished my list.
(04:00:14) Andrew: dude.
(04:00:15) Alex Jung: haha
(04:00:15) Alex Jung: kk
(04:00:16) Andrew: We Rock
(04:00:18) Andrew: Now
(04:00:19) Alex Jung: lol
(04:00:20) Andrew: let’s go to sleep.
(04:00:22) Alex Jung: ya
(04:00:23) Alex Jung: sounds good
(04:00:28) Andrew: GoodNight, let the sun shine bright.
(04:00:35) Alex Jung: hahaha
(04:00:35) Alex Jung: yaya
(04:00:37) Alex Jung: goodnight
(04:02:32) Alex Jung: your back on lol
(04:02:42) Andrew: i forgot to put the convo
(04:02:49) Alex Jung: ah lol
(04:04:58) Alex Jung: well anyways im off now lol
(04:05:03) Andrew: =) GoodNight.
(04:05:05) Alex Jung: soo goodnight =)

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